How to prepare for a therapy session

Some people like to prepare for a therapy session - others don't. Some people like to know how they'll use the session - others don't mind allowing the moment to decide. All fine and normal. But one thing is for sure: everyone wants to make the most of their session, and the following question often comes up "Lily, how should I prepare myself for my therapy session?"

Here are a few tips for preparing yourself for your session...

Consider how you want to use your session

In my case, I like to start sessions with: "How would you like to use the session today?"

It's important to note that considering what you want to explore about is NOT the same as knowing exactly what you'll say or how you'll say it, the conclusions you want to reach or the routes you want to explore (even though this may happen). You may have an idea of a topic you want to talk about, but no idea how to start. You may feel lost and need support in unpacking what's happening - and that's truly what your therapist is ready for. Even if you don't know how to start, it's a good idea to know how you'll use your session. It is yours to decide how it's used after all.

Do you want to get something particular from the session?

If this is the case, tell your therapist. Many people want to achieve something from a session and perhaps walk away with a thinking point or new insight. It can be strange to have zero purpose to a session, because the question "What are we doing here?" is going to come up.

You may want to simply experience for the first time sharing something that happened to you with another person in a secure, non-judgemental environment. You may want to "test the waters" and know how it is to say something aloud.

Or, you may come with a problem and want to unpack it with a professional so that you can walk away with a sense of a solution or way to move forwards that's right for you.

Knowing what you want from your session helps you to prepare and helps both you and your therapist to know what will be considered a useful session.

Take notes over the week

This one works for some and is cringe for others. Either way, writing notes about how you've been and what you've thought about over the week can be a winning option for checking in with yourself, keeping your counsellor in the loop when the session starts and, usefully, knowing where you want to begin.

Get in the right head space

Ah, "the right headspace". What does it mean? Right headspace implies there's a wrong headspace, which is dicey grounds. Just to be clear (in case you're wondering), angry isn't wrong. Tired isn't wrong. Sad isn't wrong.

But is there a "right" (you probably are wondering)?

I think so. The right headspace is being honest, willing and open. The three magic ingredients. You could be angry, sad and tired and also honest, willing and open. So don't worry about being wrong, just think about being in the right mood.

What could distract you?

What is going to distract you during a session? A cat (maybe yes, maybe no)? A phone? A doorbell? A stack of emails? A full bladder? A sense of wishing there was a tea in hand? Whatever could distract you, remove it, have it on hand or try to accept it.

But remember...

...being prepared is wonderful and can be your style. Also, not doing the above tips is also fine and can also work for you. The most important thing is being ready to be yourself as best you can, ready to trust your therapist and being as open as you can.

Written by Lily Llewellyn

10th April 2023

Lily is a psychotherapist trained and educated in person-centred counselling to master's level and achieved an MA in anthropology. Her areas of interest include our relationships with ourselves and others as well as the ways in which we relate to objects, such as food and money, and activities, such as shopping and work.